Can't get enough of it. Want it all the time. Hot. Cold. Doesn't matter. As long as it's strong. I like the high octane stuff. The kind that makes your cheeks by your back teeth tingle. I like it with chocolate, caramel, Sugar, Evaporated milk, cream (real cream, not that powdered crap).
About a year ago, I talked Loser into buying me a Keurig. I was instantly in love. I made coffee to my heart's content 1 cup at a time. 1 pound of coffee used to last us a week. BUT! Cup by cup, It lasted for a month! How can this be? Were we seriously wasting that much of the most delicious thing on earth? I couldn't believe it. Loser was happy because the cost of coffee went drastically down. He didn't have to make a full pot in case I wanted some and then didn't and then well, There went half a pot of coffee down the drain.
And then, One day, I made a cup of coffee while I cleaned out some drawers. The oldest twatwaffle thought that sounded good and decided to make herself one. Low and behold, She filled the K Cup ( I grind my own beans) chose her favorite cup, Hit the button and.......Nothing. What? "Unplug it and plug it back in." Again, nothing. By this time I was starting to panic. Loser starts looking at me telling me to calm down. CALM DOWN?! HOW CAN I CALM DOWN? My baby is dying and you want me to CALM DOWN?!
After an hour of taking it apart and doing his best, He delivered the bad news. We had lost it. It was over. What are we going to do now? I can't go through my day without coffee. Didn't have a spare coffee maker in the house. Why would I? I had my baby. Nothing else was needed. This couldn't be happening.
And then, He remembered. We were somewhere, (I don't remember where, I was still in shock) and Loser says "Looks like we have to break down the one your sister gave you." What? What is he talking about? and then I remembered. My oldest sister had given me a DeLonghi Espresso machine. It had been quietly waiting on the shelf in my laundry room for it's shining moment.
I brought it down. Read the manual and.....The Gods shone their mercy upon me. I bought a bottle of vanilla syrup from Starbucks and have been making Caramel Machiatos constantly. Want a Mocha? Iced or hot? A little of both? I can do that. How about some straight up espresso? I can do that. The twatwaffles keep saying it smells like Starbucks in here. I DON'T SEE THE PROBLEM!
Who wouldn't want that fantastic coffee, chocolate, nutty caramely smell in the house? Awfully comforting. I have offered everyone that comes in the door a cup of coffee. "Want some coffee? I can make anything you want" I should just buy me an apron and be done with it. A green one. OH! A MERLOTT'S APRON! Then I can combine my love of coffee AND True Blood. That's a post for another day though.
There is only 1 downfall to drinking so much coffee. I had my gallbladder removed 4 years ago. Now if you'll excuse me. I need to visit the little girls room.
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